Children Should Be Seen and Heard: Techniques for Interviewing the Child in Contested Custody Proceedings

The child is eleven years old. She's very verbal and dis played an excellent memory. She talked about school here and in New York where she has lived for approxi mately one year. She's obviously a very intelligent child. She appears to be well adjusted and showed no signifi cant anxiety. Her responses to my questions were quick and direct. She was not shy in any sense. In my view she has sufficient mental capacity to express a preference on the subject of custody. She states she has been living with her mother and her stepfather and pets. She said she loved her mother and her stepfather very much. She said she did not have any affection for her father. She said that when she visits her father or spends time with him, it always gets her upset. She said he's a cheapo. She said her father lies, and her father makes her do things around the house, in cluding washing the dishes, cleaning the house, dusting, vacuuming, et cetera. She says when her father calls her on the telephone she refuses to speak with him and hangs up. She talked of the meanness of her father and that her father criticized her unjustly. (Comments to the attorneys and parties in open court following an in camera interview.) Like many children involved in contested custody cases, the eleven-year-old girl in this case was waiting for the moment when she would finally meet the judge. She wanted to let someone know exactly how she felt. While it was suspected that the child had some mixed negative feelings about her father, the directness and in tensity of her in camera statements surprised the parties. As a result, custody was awarded to the mother, visita tion was ordered for the father, and counseling was mandated for all the participants. Even though the father in this case was unprepared for the child's frankness, most judges know it is not un usual for children to express very definite feelings about who they want to live with. Often a child will say, you the judge? Are you the one who's going to decide this case? Okay. This is how I feel. The child who has developed a clear psychological attachment to one par