1986•Psychological ReviewRequires access

A triangular theory of love.

Robert J. Sternberg

Open publisher page 2,248 citations

Abstract

This article presents a triangular theory of love. According the theory, has three components: (a) intimacy, which encompasses the feelings of closeness, connectedness, and bondedness one experiences in loving relationships; (b) passion, which encompasses the drives that lead romance, physical attraction, and sexual consummation; and (c) decision/commitment, which encompasses, in the short term, the decision that one loves another, and in the long term, the commitment maintain that love. The amount of one experiences depends on the absolute strength of these three components, and the kind of one experiences depends on their strengths relative each other. The three components interact with each other and with the actions that they produce and that produce them so as form a number of different kinds of loving experiences. The triangular theory of subsumes certain other theories and can account for a number of empirical findings in the research literature, as well as for a number of experiences with which many are familiar firsthand. It is proposed that the triangular theory provides a rather comprehensive basis for understanding many aspects of the that underlies close relationships. What does it mean to love someone? Does it always mean the same thing, and if not, in what ways do loves differ from each other? Why do certain loves seem last, whereas others disappear almost as quickly as they are formed? This article seeks answer these and other questions through a triangular theory of love. This tripartite theory deals both with the nature of and with loves in various kinds of relationships. The presentation of the theory will be divided into three main parts. In the first part, the main tenets of the theory will be explained and discussed, and the theory will be compared with other theories of love. In the second part, the implications of the theory for close relationships and satisfaction in them will be described. In the third part, the theory will be shown account for many of the empirical phenomena that have been observed with regard love.

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What this paper is about

This article presents a triangular theory of love. According the theory, has three components: (a) intimacy, which encompasses the feelings of closeness, connectedness, and bondedness one experiences in loving relationships; (b) passion, which encompasses the drives that lead romance, physical attraction, and sexual consummation; and (c) decision/commitment, which encompasses, in the short term, the decision that one loves another, and in the long term, the commitment maintain that love. The amount of one experiences depends on the absolute strength of these three components, and the kind of one experiences depends on their strengths relative each other. The three components interact with each other and with the actions that they produce and that produce them so as form a number of different kinds of loving experiences. The triangular theory of subsumes certain other theories and can account for a number of empirical findings in the research literature, as well as for a number of experiences with which many are familiar firsthand. It is proposed that the triangular theory provides a rather comprehensive basis for understanding many aspects of the that underlies close relationships. What does it mean to love someone? Does it always mean the same thing, and if not, in what ways do loves differ from each other? Why do certain loves seem last, whereas others disappear almost as quickly as they are formed? This article seeks answer these and other questions through a triangular theory of love. This tripartite theory deals both with the nature of and with loves in various kinds of relationships. The presentation of the theory will be divided into three main parts. In the first part, the main tenets of the theory will be explained and discussed, and the theory will be compared with other theories of love. In the second part, the implications of the theory for close relationships and satisfaction in them will be described. In the third part, the theory will be shown account for many of the empirical phenomena that have been observed with regard love.

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Available abstract

This article presents a triangular theory of love. According the theory, has three components: (a) intimacy, which encompasses the feelings of closeness, connectedness, and bondedness one experiences in loving relationships; (b) passion, which encompasses the drives that lead romance, physical attraction, and sexual consummation; and (c) decision/commitment, which encompasses, in the short term, the decision that one loves another, and in the long term, the commitment maintain that love. The amount of one experiences depends on the absolute strength of these three components, and the kind of one experiences depends on their strengths relative each other. The three components interact with each other and with the actions that they produce and that produce them so as form a number of different kinds of loving experiences. The triangular theory of subsumes certain other theories and can account for a number of empirical findings in the research literature, as well as for a number of experiences with which many are familiar firsthand. It is proposed that the triangular theory provides a rather comprehensive basis for understanding many aspects of the that underlies close relationships. What does it mean to love someone? Does it always mean the same thing, and if not, in what ways do loves differ from each other? Why do certain loves seem last, whereas others disappear almost as quickly as they are formed? This article seeks answer these and other questions through a triangular theory of love. This tripartite theory deals both with the nature of and with loves in various kinds of relationships. The presentation of the theory will be divided into three main parts. In the first part, the main tenets of the theory will be explained and discussed, and the theory will be compared with other theories of love. In the second part, the implications of the theory for close relationships and satisfaction in them will be described. In the third part, the theory will be shown account for many of the empirical phenomena that have been observed with regard love.

Key concepts: Psychology, Social psychology, Cognitive psychology, Psychoanalysis, Epistemology, Philosophy

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